Asked Ah ma.
This is Ah Ma. She always ensures our tummies are filled with food. She will always asks if we have eaten when we come home from work; and when we work late, she will call to check if we’ve had dinner. If we replied no, she will hurry downstairs to buy chicken rice so that we won’t be hungry. It’s not because she loves chicken rice but she only knows how to order chicken rice.
Ah ma is simple.
She does not know how to take public transport and the only place she goes is the nearby market. And she is very popular because many people will wave to her when she goes down for marketing. When I ask her, “Who is that?” She replies: “I don’t know, they wave at me then i wave back.”
Ah ma is adorable in her own ways.
There was once we found her at the fitness corner and she was playing the swing. She saw us from afar, and she smiled widely and waved to us. She continued swinging and we asked her what she was doing and she said she is exercising. How cute is that, sitting on the swing like a child; exercising. She would also oblige us to play childish games with us or take selfies with us, even though she says no. She will say don’t want to eat but end up eating when we feed her. I guess she finds it hard to reject her adorable grandchildren.
I miss her, we miss her.
We miss how she secretly passes us her secret money, that $10, $20 and she would say in Hokkien, “shhs, dont say.” (With the finger on her lips).
Even though we are working adults, we’re still the little kids whom she looked after for so many years. I miss how she will call me and ask what I am doing, if I have slept, why so late already don’t want sleep ah? Even though, it’s just that short 3 minutes; it means so so much to me. I wish… I can hear her voice again.
She loves to stand along the corridor and see if anyone comes to visit her. She will peek over the railing and see our car turn into the carpark; walk to the lift which is 8 units away, just to welcome us. Her cheeky big wide smile is the first thing that greets us once the lift door opens. When we go home, she would repeat the cycle again; peek at us, wave goodbye to us from the corridor and wait for us to fully exited the carpark before heading back into the flat.
We miss everything about her.
We miss her, sitting there on the sofa, looking annoyed at all the nonsense things we say and do; but still smiling and grinning away.
We will never find anyone who is more willing to be there waiting for us, we will never find anyone who is more willing to love us like how you love and dote us.
We’ll never be able to say enough thank you for being our Ah ma. We’re more than grateful and blessed that you are our Ah Ma. We wish you still have many more years to go, but we know we cannot hold on to you because you have been hiding your pain in front of us. Thank you for bearing with our nonsense even when fighting with your physical pain. Thank you for letting us grant you your last wish. Thank you for always giving us the best of the best.
And looking back. Thank you for not letting us go despite having two major head surgeries back in 2015. The doctors asked us to be prepared for your demise… but you held on, recovered and spent another 8 years with us.
You make us proud.
Because of your determination.
We’re able to have 8 years of beautiful memories with you.
You saw your great grand children… 3 of them.
You will always be the best of the best.
We can never replace you.
We can never find another you.
We love you and we miss you having you around.
Thank you for letting us be your grandchildren, and great-grandchildren. We want to be your grandchildren again. We know you have reunited with Ah gong.
It’s okay, Ah Ma, don’t worry. You can rest now.
You’ll always be in our hearts.
Always missing you.